When did things change

It happens so slowly. It's almost as if it happened over night. We change. Our feelings change. Then it's a downward spiral. If only we could know in advance, but then again we may never take chances. I'm always shocked when people divorce. Even when I kinda knew it would happen. They go from being so into each other to hating one another.

We're really fickle I think. I love someone one day, the next day, I'm done with them. It only seems that way. What really happened is the slow erosion of trust through singular and often times small actions.

Fear forces our hand

I wonder if I would have ended up settling into a relationship had I not endeavored to learn how to date. It makes me question the circumstances by which others have fallen into their relationships.

Recently, I was discussing my exploits with someone who seemed amazed. I was struck by the fact that this guy is super successful and confident and he seemed like a good guy. Yet, he admitted his own fear and insecurities around interacting with women.

It mad me wonder. Do we just grab what we find and hold onto it without question or is that just a better way?

Be Blunt

Never be afraid. Swing for the fences. Rock the boat. 

It is true. When I don't care, I say what I really feel, without fear of repercussion, it usually turns out better. Not necessarily good, but better. Being a chameleon, changing to meet the needs of others is never a great thing. To quote someone who quoted someone else, "I don't know the secret to success, but I do know the key to failure: trying to please everyone."

The difference

I made her leave after I was done because there was no reason for her to stay. Made me think. Made me wonder. Per my previous post, if all p---y is the same, then what makes me constantly want another woman?

When the levee breaks

I love to push the limits with the women I know. I want to see how far and how much I can stretch their limits. I believe it's my way of forcing them away. It's a lot like the art of negotiating. If I act or convince myself that I don't want something I can push hard. 

5 hours in a car

You learn a lot about a person driving for that much time together. Every so often, it's a good choice! I recently drove with a new employee for about that time. The relevance to my blog: he made a comment regarding his 20 year plus relationship. He's very happy. They have no kids. His comment: If anything happened to their relationship or he lost her, he said he would only need a "hooker and a maid." I know that's really base and probably too crass for your innocent ears, but I understood what he meant. Ultimately, as we age, it becomes really difficult to go out and find someone to invest in emotionally. I think I was there a while ago.

It's all the same, only the names change...

That's the first line in the Bon Jovi song "Wanted: Dead or Alive."

I can apply that statement to any number of situations in life, but since this is my blog on dating women, well, I'll correlate it to women.

First situation: An older guy recently emailed me to ask me about his girlfriend lol. How and why did he contact me? My email was in her contact list and yes, she and I did see each other. Here's a guy that is possessive, jealous and old. He's dating a 22 year old and expects her to want to act like a 30 year old in a relationship. The point, as it relates to this story and the statement above: at 22, all p---y is just that, p---y. 

Second situation: I was recently seeing a girl less than half my age, wait, that's a common occurrence lol. Anyway, I tell her that I'm not looking for anything serious or ongoing. I tell her that women fulfill a need in my life right now, nothing else. Now she thinks I'm the guy she needs to be with!! Anyway, the story never changes, just the actors.