Sex and the City

I admit it. I watched this movie of my own accord. Sometimes to get an understanding of one's prey, one must immerse oneself into the habitat and conventions of said prey. Aside from rolling my eyes for at least two-thirds of the movie, once I got past the superficial fantasy that this epic tale has bestowed upon female society. A plague of expectations it paints for men. Yes, women seem to forget that they too have promoted an unrealistic view of what relationships, men and life should be. After I looked past all of that, there was much I observed and learned. Much of it hit a little close to home. Perhaps there is something deeper than the love of shoes.

A scene that really hit home for me involved Miranda and Steve. During sex, she makes a remark something like "hurry up and get it over with already." Not surprisingly, he stops, gets up (and out) and next thing we know he's admitting to her that he slept with some random woman. Basically, he goes somewhere else to get laid because, as she told him, she doesn't have time for that. She gets all bent out of shape when he admits his indiscretion.

I wonder why, if you're in a relationship where your partner has no physical interest why would that person be upset if you go somewhere else. I believe love and lust can exist within one relationship, but I also believe it can exist exclusive of one another. Both partners have a responsibility to the relationship, to themselves and to the other person. I understand it's a trust and loyalty issue. I understand that. But let's play out a scenario.

Let's assume my partner thinks it's "work" to have sex with me. Let's also make the assumption that when the relationship began, my partner and I were all over each other like rabbits. Obviously, something changed along the way. Now, let's assume I confront my partner and ask why and what's wrong. If my partner cannot provide honest insight into what she's feeling and things don't change, what is the next course of action? End the relationship? Seek professional help? Go get my physical needs met elsewhere? What is the right thing to do? Is it only my responsibility or should she also take responsibility?